What if you don't feel thankful this Thanksgiving.

Let's be honest with each other for a moment.  Most of us have seasons in life when gratitude is hard.  These seasons are especially pronounced if they coincide with Thanksgiving, the time of the year when we are expected to be extra grateful. Maybe this is your first Thanksgiving after a divorce or without your children. Perhaps you have lost someone very special to you and feeling thankful just doesn't fit the loneliness and grief you feel constantly. You are not alone with these feelings friend. So, what can you do if you don't feel thankful this Thanksgiving?

Give yourself grace.

Everyone goes through hard seasons and times when it’s difficult to see the positive in our lives.  And if you are in the middle of a life-altering season, being thankful feels impossible, even for the obvious things.  Reassure yourself this is temporary, and you will likely feel different in the future.  It’s okay to not be grateful 100% of the time; no one is.

Try something new.

Are you dreading the routine and stress of your normal Thanksgiving traditions, or perhaps the thought of the loss of the traditions you’ve always had? Maybe it’s time to change up those traditions and make new ones. Instead of cooking the big Thanksgiving meal, try breakfast for dinner! Or if your children or loved ones are missing from the table this year, ask a friend or neighbor if you can join them. If you are solo this Thanksgiving, try doing something fun, like painting a picture, reading a book, or having a picnic at the park. The possibilities are endless!

Be honest about how you’re feeling.

Journal your thoughts, lament, and write out exactly what you’re feeling. Oftentimes, just getting out all the unwanted thoughts and feelings opens you up to see the good things around you. And when you journal, your body, and mind are frequently able to release the hurt and pain you are feeling, leaving you less tense and more relaxed.

Cultivate thankfulness.

Yes, you can cultivate thankfulness even though you don't feel it! Sometimes, the action of gratitude leads to feelings of gratitude.

• Start by writing a list of the different areas of your life that you “should” be thankful for (even if you don’t feel thankful). It can be as simple as having breath in your lungs or sunshine to warm you up.  
• Write a note or thank you card to let someone know how they have positively impacted your life.
• Do something nice for someone else. You could buy the person behind you in line a coffee, play cards with an aging neighbor, or smile at 10 strangers that pass by. Even the smallest acts of kindness can change your mindset and increase gratitude.